When is a person truly “in” the Kingdom of God?

It is a valid question for anyone to ask, whether Christian or Atheist. When exactly is a person accepted into the Kingdom of God? Is it at baptism? Is it after one says some lines to heaven? Is is after we confess our sins to a priest? Or, instead, has it all been predetermined millenniums before anyone even asked such a question? When asking such theological questions, it only makes sense to turn to the book of God's word – the Bible.

A. Old Testament Theology

It seems that the old testament is rather blunt when answering who is and who isn't in the Kingdom of God. Throughout the testament, God holds up to a covenant he made with Abraham. (Genesis 15:8) The Israelites became God's chosen people, and the old testament follows their story.

God's Chosen

First of all, we can look at Deuteronomy 7:6-11. God is telling the Israelites that they are his “holy people,” and that out off all nations on earth they are “his treasured possession.” (verse 6) This appears to mean that God values the Israelite nation above all others. They have a special connection to Him. The passage further goes on to explain that God did not choose them because they were a great or mighty nation, but because they were the “fewest of all people.” (verse 7) Therefore, God does not select people based on how great their country or nation is. Such earthly signs of power and greatness mean nothing to God.

God continues to say in verse 8 that they were chosen because God loved them and made and oath with their forefathers. He also says in verse 9 that the “covenant of love” was to last for “a thousand generations of those who love him and keep his commands.” This opens up all kinds of questions. First, does Gods love for the Israelites only last for 1,000 generations? Are these chosen people the only ones that will inherit the Kingdom? Or, is God's love more open to anyone willing to “love him and keep his commands?” This does not necessarily seem like an option if God is telling the Israelites to destroy the nations that oppose him earlier in chapter 7. God wants the people to follow his commands because he loves them, and has established laws that need to be followed in order to accept this love. (verse 11)

An Exception?

We often see God angry at the Israelites, causing them to die. Yet, in the old testament we see God saving¹ people for simply helping the Israelites. One such example is Rahab the prostitute. Her story begins in Joshua 2. In particular verse 11² shows Rahab recognizing God as the Lord of heaven. She asks to be spared, and is told that she will be. This is an interesting concept. Rahab, who was not an Israelite, was going to be the only one in Jericho to be saved, yet she was a prostitute, and had just lied to protect two Israelites. She simply protects the Lord's chosen, and is spared when the walls fall. In Joshua 2:15 the Bible says that Rahab's house was connected to the city walls. However, in Joshua 6:20, God causes the walls to fall, but in verse 23 the two Israelites go in and bring her and her family out unharmed. This seems to imply that God must have kept her part of the wall intact, otherwise she would have been crushed. Thus the Lord saved her, and in verse 25 she is brought to live with the Israelites.

But did this allow Rahab into the Kingdom of God? Was recognizing him an entry point to the Kingdom even though she was not Israeli? According to a study done by David Guzik on Joshua 2, a number of factors play into the salvation of Rahab. First, he claims that though she was a prostitute, she had faith. She recognized God as who he is and accepted Him. Guzik goes so far as to say that Rahab wanted to leave her life of sin and join God's people based on Joshua 2:12. (2001) He even claims that God went so far as to send the spies to save her, and that this was God's only reason for sending them. In fact, the fact that the spies went to Jericho did not affect God's strategy at all or help it in any way. (Guzik 2001) A final thing Guzik notes is the importance of the scarlet cord. He claims that theologians as far back as the first century recognized the cord as a symbol of Jesus' blood. (Guzik 2001) In James 2:25³ Rahab is even recognized as “righteous.” It would appear that God accepted her, and even placed her into the Israelite nation. Did God accept her because she accepted him? Or, did God accept her because she was willing to become Israeli and accept their ways because God had chosen them?

Still God's Choosing

Rahab, even according to Guzik, was chosen by God. It seemed that it was part of God's plan to find Rahab. She was already willing to accept the ways of the Lord, but she had no way to do it. Thus, God sent the spies to retrieve her. He chose to accept and save her. By herself, it appears Rahab had no hope of salvation, she was to be destroyed with the rest of the city. God extended his love to her so that she could receive it. She was chosen amongst the entire city to be spared. Not even the children were allowed to live. Therefore, it would seem, that Old Testament theology supports the idea of God choosing those that he wishes to save. This does not mean that a person had to be Israeli because it was possible for someone to join the Israelites and live amongst them.

A. New Testament Developments

It would seem that the New Testament views acceptance into the Kingdom differently. With things like “preaching to the ends of the earth,” and “first the Jew then the Gentile,” and John 3:16, it is hard to see God as only accepting his chosen Israelites into the Kingdom. So what caused this apparent change? Did the 1000 generations meet its end? Or was it something else?

Jesus Wins

First, it should be declared that the rejection of Jesus (as God's Son) is a rejection of God (Himself) as clearly stated in Luke 10:16⁴. Deuteronomy 7:10⁵ mentions that those who reject (hate) God will be met with destruction. Therefore, the rejection of Christ seems to guarantee that a person will not be accepted into the Kingdom. John 8:31-47 relates to the passage in Deuteronomy in a unique way. In John, the Jews are telling Jesus that they are Abraham's children. They are using this as a means of salvation. Jesus tells them they are not truly sons of Abraham because they are rejecting him and trying to kill him; something Abraham would never do. In fact, in verse 37, Jesus recognizes them as Abraham's descendants. Thus, it would seem that simply being part of Abraham's tribe, or Israeli was no longer enough to be accepted by God. Abraham's descendants were missing their promised savior.

Ask, and you are in

Later on in Luke we find another interesting story of Jesus accepting someone into the kingdom. This is found in Luke 23:32-43. Jesus is about to be crucified on the cross. However, he is not alone, but with two other men, criminals. One of them decides to mock Jesus, but the other recognizes his dire situation. He also she Jesus as innocent, and apparently believes that he is the King that he says he is. In particular, an exchange in made in verses 42-43, “then he said, 'Jesus, remember me when you come into your kingdom.' Jesus answered him, 'Truly I tell you, today you will be with me in paradise.'” What did this man do to deserve such an honor? He was a criminal until his dying breath. He doesn't ask for forgiveness, there is nothing indicating that he is Abraham's descendant, and there is no sign of God accepting him first. Instead, the man cries out to Jesus with his dying breath. His simple request is to be remembered, and Jesus promises him that he will be in paradise that day. All this man had to do was ask Jesus before he died to be accepted into the Kingdom, and he was.

Baptism, and the Holy Spirit

In the book of Acts, Jesus has already gone from the earth. He has left his disciples in charge of carrying on the message of life. In Acts chapter 2 Peter is speaking to a crowd of people. After a while of listening to his message, they wanted to know how they could be accepted into the Kingdom. Peter tells them in verse 38 that they need to repent of their sins and be baptized. This will allow them to “receive the gift of the Holy Spirit.” (verse 38) However, it is interesting that Peter does not stop there. He makes a peculiar statement in verse 39 when he says “as many as the Lord our God will call to Himself.” (NASB) This returns to the idea in Deuteronomy that God is calling out and choosing people. In Acts this is not limited to Jews or Israelites, but to everyone. God was opening up the Kingdom to all who would receive His calling. Jesus told the disciples to go to everyone in the world and share what he had done.⁶ It would seem that Jesus was making his call to everyone, so when Peter mentions the statement in verse 39, he is likely referring to all people who will accept God's call.

Here we find two new requirements to entering the Kingdom. The first is repentance. In the Old Testament this meant that someone had to make an animal sacrifice, a blood sacrifice. However, Jesus was the eternal sacrifice, so repentance meant believing that Jesus shed his blood for forgiveness of sins. The second step was getting baptized. This is something that Jesus himself did while he was on earth. This is how Jesus received the Holy Spirit in a special way, and he was setting an example for future believers who wished to follow him.

Being an Israelite does NOT save a person

Paul takes things to a new level. In his letter to the Romans (in particular chapter 10), he explicitly states that the Israelites are not saved. Though the Israelites claim that they are seeking the righteousness of God, they are actually missing it because they have rejected the message of Christ. Pail then goes on to say in verse 9 that a person simply has to state that “Jesus is Lord,” and believe that “God raised him from the dead,” in order to be saved. He does not mention baptism. He explains himself a bit more in verse 10. Here he says that you believe to become justified, but you confess with your mouth to profess your faith. Thus, it seems that Paul is saying that professing faith is required in order to be saved.

Explaining how to become saved is not the end of Paul's message. He goes on to explain that “there is no difference between Jew and Gentile.” This would mean that God is not choosing a favored nation to save. Paul ends by saying in verse 13 that “Everyone who calls on the name of the Lord will be saved.” There is no mention here of the Lord calling to people first or people answering God's call. People are the ones calling out to God to become saved.

C. The Trajectory of the Kingdom

It seems that there is not only significant difference in to the means of grace between the Old and New Testament, but also differences between books in the New Testament. So what is the final verdict? How exactly does a person truly become into the Kingdom of God? At what point is a person actually going to heaven? The Bible does not seem to have a completely clear answer, however, some conclusions can still be drawn.

For example, the concept of being a Christian requires the believe in Jesus as God's son. This could not have been the case for the people living in the Old Testament because Jesus had not yet come to the earth. However, today it seems to be clear throughout the New Testament that acceptance of Jesus as God's son, and his death and resurrection are indisputable facts required to be in the Kingdom. However, after this there seems to be some discrepancy as to the formal requirements for salvation. Perhaps this is all part of God's plan. There is no set way of attaining salvation. There is only the acceptance of the Christ story.

A man on his dying breath was saved by asking, a crowd of Jews were saved by baptism and the Holy Spirit, other Jews were pleaded with to accept the message of salvation, but what do these things have in common? All these people accepted or were told about the salvation through Jesus Christ. There is no earthly way to know if another person is actually saved. Only God knows a person's true heart. God may have left the perfect definition of salvation blurry on purpose. This allows him to judge as he will. So how does one answer the question, “When is a person truly 'in' the kingdom of God?” Perhaps the answer is simply, whenever God says so, and accepts a person's heart as genuine. It has been said⁷, there is only one way to salvation, but there are thousands of ways to Jesus. A number of ways are described throughout the scriptures, and each of these people were promised salvation, but it is likely that new ways to Jesus are discovered every day.

Resources

Guzik, D. (n.d.). Joshua 2 - The Salvation of Rahab. Enduring Word Media. 2001. Retrieved October 14, 2011, from http://www.enduringword.com/commentaries/0602.htm

1The term saving here is directly relating the idea of saving one's earthly life, not necessarily their eternal soul.

2“11 When we heard of it, our hearts melted in fear and everyone’s courage failed because of you, for the LORD your God is God in heaven above and on the earth below.” (NIV)

3“In the same way, was not even Rahab the prostitute considered righteous for what she did when she gave lodging to the spies and sent them off in a different direction?” (NIV)

4“'Whoever listens to you listens to me; whoever rejects you rejects me; but whoever rejects me rejects him who sent me.'” (NIV)

5“But those who hate him he will repay to their face by destruction; he will not be slow to repay to their face those who hate him.” (NIV)

6Acts 1:8

7This is a common quote used in sermons and conversation, thus there is no real way to target a source.

A (very) Brief Study on Mother Teresa Part 2/2

“The good you do today may be forgotten tomorrow. Do good anyway.”

This may be my favorite part of the quote. What more difficult challenge could Mother Teresa have given to us? Human nature and society does not live by this rule. We often want the things we do today to make a difference in the world tomorrow. We want to be recognized, praised, and thanked for the good things that we do. But what does the Bible say about this idea?

Matthew 6:1-5 “Be careful not to practice your righteousness in front of others to be seen by them. If you do, you will have no reward from your Father in heaven. 2 So when you give to the needy, do not announce it with trumpets, as the hypocrites do in the synagogues and on the streets, to be honored by others. Truly I tell you, they have received their reward in full. 3 But when you give to the needy, do not let your left hand know what your right hand is doing, 4 so that your giving may be in secret. Then your Father, who sees what is done in secret, will reward you.”
 
That is a pretty difficult verse to live by. Something inside of us tells us that we deserve the attention from other people when we do something good. There is another way to take this quote. Perhaps you have done something good for someone, or have tried to help someone today, but what happens when there is little chance that our help and good does little for that person in the future? It might even seem that our efforts did nothing. The person has taken our help and thrown it away, not caring that we just took the time to think of them first. Or, perhaps they did not listen to our good, kind, helpful words of wisdom. We are called to do good, and to keep trying anyway. Even when nothing we seem to do makes a difference, our hearts are what matters. If we are trying to the best of our ability to do good in the eyes of the Lord, for the Lord's people, and to the Lord's people, then too will we be blameless before Him.
 
For a good biblical reflection on this part I would recommend the book of Jeremiah. Doing a quick search I couldn't find specific verses to back up the idea. However, I do know the idea behind the entire book. Countless times Jeremiah tried to help the people of Judah. He was following God's plan and was trying his hardest to help the people. In the end, despite his best efforts the people of Judah could not be saved. God was tired of tolerating their insolence, Jeremiah was their last chance. Jeremiah was never appreciated for his Good that he tried to do. He was hated an ran out of town. People instantly forgot his message of hope, and nothing he did seemed to matter.

“Give the world the best you have and it may never be enough. Give your best anyway.”
 
Oh how true this can be. How often is our best just not good enough. People will want and expect more. Give a person an inch and they will take a yard is a common mentality, but what happens when there is only an inch to give? We are sometimes blames and called selfish. This is unfair even though we gave our best. The only time we should ever be able to regret is when we know we didn't give our best when we could have. An athlete is often asked if they did their best. Most of the time we would like to believe that they do, and many times their best was not as good as someone elses. Does this mean that we should stop trying to give our best because we are going to disappoint anyway? Not according to Mother Teresa.

Ecclesiastes 9:10 “Whatever your hand finds to do, do it with all your might, for in the grave, where you are going, there is neither working nor planning nor knowledge nor wisdom.”

 
“For you see, in the end, it is between you and God. It was never between you and them anyway.”
 
I could not think of a better way for her to end her quote. When it is all said and done nothing matters between us and the world. Everything we say, everything we think, and everything we do is to God, for God, and about God. He is the overall judge. He is the one that we are affecting overall. Nothing and no one matters outside of the Lord. In the beginning God made us, in the end He will decide whether we deserve to be kept, or if we deserve to be separated from the creator forever. We can serve only one master, God, or mankind. I pray that the choice is obvious.

Colossians 3:23 “Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for men.”

Matthew 6:24 “No one can serve two masters; for either he will hate the one and love the other, or he will be devoted to one and despise the other. You cannot serve God and wealth.”

In the end it seems that Mother Teresa is trying to describe a model for living. She is likely hinting at a way that we can live like Christ. Everyone knows who Mother Teresa is, and most everyone knows her for her kindness and goodness to the world and mankind. There are some people who question Mother Teresa's dedication to Jesus Christ. It seems that some would even claim that she was very wrapped up in Catholicism and claimed she was an idolater. Such statements are touch to swallow, and I leave them in God's hands to be the judge or her soul, for it is far beyond me to say who is and who is not saved. Still many others would claim that there is not way she is not in heaven, but, these people are also often ones that believe that a 'good person' gets to heaven and that works are important. I think I found after brief study that Catholicism has a heavy belief that both works and faith get you to heaven. I personally believe that faith alone even without works will allow you to heaven, but this is not the life we are called to, and God may not be pleased. (See blog on being Luke Warm) However, there is not way that Mother Teresa was completely crazy, as I managed to find a Bible verse that very closely resembles her quotation.

Luke 6:37-38 “Do not judge, and you will not be judged. Do not condemn, and you will not be condemned. Forgive, and you will be forgiven. Give, and it will be given to you. A good measure, pressed down, shaken together and running over, will be poured into your lap. For with the measure you use, it will be measured to you.”

So I end with this. Examine how you are living. Which master are you serving? And how will you serve the Master? It may be by faith that we are saved, but do not forget, a majority of the Bible is about how we are to live based on faith. How we live our lives now is not to be taken lightly.

Your friend, brother, and companion in Christ,
-Zach Haas

Spiritual Gifts Assessment: Part 1

 All right here it is. The blog that I first mentioned nearly a week ago. This may even end up being a two part blog in order to keep it at some kind of reasonable length.

  Anyway, many of you may remember me at lunch or dinner talking about how much I don't care for personality tests. I took psychology last fall and there were a number of these survey tests that told you who you are. I generally think they are a bunch of hullabaloo just because of their format and inaccuracy prone tendencies. Well, despite not liking survey type tests I took a Spiritual Gifts test about a week and a half ago and was rather surprised with the results. I will list them here and talk a little about each one and how I think they apply to me. I was shocked at what I found. I would like to mention before I start that there were actually two different tests, one directed to adults, the other towards teens. I will start with the adult listed from highest to least highest. (http://www.kodachrome.org/spiritgift/)

  1. Discernment – This was not surprising to me really at all. I have noticed this gift in my life as most prevalent over all others. More recently, I may have realized a specialized version of this gift in my life. It is something that I am currently looking into and praying about, but I think that I may have the ability to “judge” people before ever talking to them or knowing them. I don't know exactly how to explain this but I first became aware of this gift when I heard someone talking about the ability to see colors on other people. Actually, when I first heard about the color thing I sorta shrugged it off as weird and making really no sense. However, recently I was randomly thinking about it and started wondering if it wasn't weird at all. Further more I started to think I may have the same ability, though I wouldn't use the word color. I did some more research on the matter and found that the person who could see colors on people had a slightly different gift but still very similar. The best way I can describe it is that I can sometimes sense the good or bad on people. I can generally sense this either by seeing them or hearing them say just a few sentences. I have talked to people before and been around them and was just uncomfortable. I could tell there was something wrong about them or something not right.

  Another example of my discernment ability came to me when I was sitting in a “mega” church. My whole life I have grown up in a small church where I knew everyone by name. This has always been where I found God and where I was comfortable worshiping. I have never really thought bad about big churches but at the same time was never a fan. The first time I ever went to Central Wesleyan Church in Holland Michigan I was just amazed at is size and splendor. The second time I went I had a slightly different experience. I was sitting there in the pew not really thinking about the message that much when I had a feeling from God. There was a sense of peace around me. Then it was almost as if God was saying to me “Do you not see me here? Yes Zachary, this is not what you are used too and this is not what you prefer, but do you not see me? I am here. Feel my presence. I am here in this church working just as I am in your small church back home. There is nothing wrong with this large church as their focus is on me and I am with them.” Part of me felt guilty, but at the same time more just very content. I never doubted that God could use and was in big churches. But this was a really neat experience, especially since this was my girlfriends church! Big churches have their place in the world. They have resources and abilities that small churches will never have. I believe each are important and play their role in the kingdom of God.

  2. Pastoring – This one came as kind of a surprise, but not in the way you might think. This has been something that I have juggled in my mind ever since I was 12 years old. Of course, most of me wants to believe that what I thought when I was 12 was weak and immature. However, the idea of being a spiritual leader has never really left me. This is something that I am almost certain is not something that I am supposed to explore yet. Especially since I have been trying to take intro to youth ministries ever since I was a freshman and haven't been able to fit it into my class schedule. I've never really considered becoming an actual pastor. My heart has always been more for teenagers. However, after having been in a small group of young adults this summer, my passion may be changing slightly. I still love the idea of being able to help and guide teens, but leading a group of young adults is becoming very appealing to me. However, I still don't think it is my time yet to be involved in these areas. I do feel that God wants me to do something with this eventually, but not now, and I am okay with that. I also think that to do many of the things that I'd want to do, I may need to get married first – and marriage is not really on my horizon right now either.

   2. (There was a tie) Faith – This was definitely the most surprising to me of all the answers. Faith? First of all, I have never thought of myself as a person with great faith. Second, I thought that faith was essential to Christianity. I didn't realize that there was a spiritual gift of faith until this test. Hebrews 11 is a cool chapter about faith if anyone is interested. According to the website that I took the test at they defined the spiritual gift of faith as: “The special conviction God gives to some to be firmly persuaded of God's power and promises to accomplish His will and purpose and to display such a confidence in Him and His Word that circumstances and obstacles do not shake that conviction.” I like this definition and can see how this is prevalent in my life. I was surprised to see how accurately the gift of faith fits into my life and who I see myself as. I also know that this is the gift that will take the most work for me to maintain and use. I can see that I can be a person of faith, but I can also see how easy it would be to waste this gift. This is a really cool discovery for me and definitely something I will be looking into more with great interest.

  3. Poverty – Okay, I know I said faith was the most surprising find of my gifts, but this was definitely the most scary. When I first read this I thought “OH NO! God, I don't want this gift. I don't want to live in poverty and be poor my whole life, please tell me it isn't so!” However, as I read the description of it more I was calmed and satisfied. The spiritual gift of poverty can mean that you are called to live among people. It may mean that you have the means necessary to live higher, but choose to live lower in order to better relate to people. I love this idea. I do not need to be elaborate and extravagant. A simple content life would be great to me. Granted, I do want a house big enough that I can have people over, I think this goes along with gift number 2 just fine. Acts 4:32-35 is a great way to look at it for those curious.

  Well guys, there you have it. The beginning of my own personal spiritual gifts assessment. I don't want this to get too long by itself, and it is getting late – I have to work every day this week until Sunday. I generally have Wednesdays off but I told a friend I would do him a favor and come in for him. I will pick up where I left off soon enough. I hope you have enjoyed learning more about me as I learn more about myself. Thanks for your prayers and support.

Your friend, brother, and companion in Christ,

-Zachary Haas

A Failed Attempt At Faith

Today was a rather interesting day.  I went to work and got sent home due to weather and the fact that I will likely have to go to work on my normal day off to shoot a commercial.  Yup thats right, I get to be in a commercial for my work.  It's pretty cool.  Hopefully I will be able to get a copy to share with everyone at some point.

Anyway, I made plans with a few people at work to go rock climbing at the indoor rock climbing gym.  It was a lot of fun, but man, I am incredibly out of shape.  Anyway, I met two older coworkers there (ones 23, the other 26).  They were pretty good at climbing and I consider them my adventurous friends.  They are those friends that are great people but not Christians.  After dinner we decided to go to dinner at a local "pub" that yet another coworker works at.  Yup thats right, I saw more coworkers outside of work today than I did at work.  Theres something wrong with that picture.

Really weird thing.  I actually had thought earlier in the day if I would ever have a chance to share my faith with some of my non-Christians friends, and if I had the chance would I step up to the challenge.  Crazy huh? Who thinks about that.  Well guess what happened during dinner?  Yup you guessed it I had the chance.  But even better, I was up to the challenge... sorta.

I don't even know how it happened but we got on the topic of evolution.  Both my friends started arguing for evolution (macro) and bashing (mildly) creationism.  I decided that I was going to safely, show my faith and argue against evolution.  I didn't say that I believed in creationism, I only said that I didn't see how evolution really made that much sense.  So he tried using an example of how we came from fish and pointed to some similarities and things.  I started to try to argue against evolution.  (See how I was safely showing my faith?  I never said what I believed, and I never mentioned Christianity or God at all, I may have but we didn't really get that far because of a distraction -- perhaps God pulling me out of a losing fight.  By the way... I do not promote the 'safe' faith showing.  I do not think we are called as Christians to play it safe.  Jesus never played it safe.  He died for complete strangers that killed him)  But man... I just sounded like an idiot.  I don't know what happened but nothing I said seemed to make any sense and even fueled their belief in evolution.  It was terrible.  Here I was trying to take a small stand against evolution and I was actually proving myself wrong?  I was losing the argument I started.  The only thing I can hope to have accomplished is them thinking that evolution could be wrong but thats a stretch.  I just sounded like a fool that was ignorant and didn't know what he was talking about.  So yea, that was a pretty big fail on my part. :/

I guess I really need to research more on evolution.  This is what I found after a quick search its pretty cool but doesn't quite explain what I want. http://www.layhands.com/EvidenceAgainstEvolution.htm

Anyone who has some good evidence that supports creationism and goes against evolution I might be able to use the help.  I rather not sound like a fool when trying to defend the ways of God.  Thanks guys, sorry for this  failure.  I may have more chances to redeem myself before the end of summer.  Pray for me.

Your friend, brother and companion in Christ,
-Zachary Haas

The Reason

All right everyone here is my first post.  To start off I feel like I owe everyone an explanation.  No, I am not going on some kind of trip or journey, at least not really.  No I am not working someplace special or on some internship or anything like that.  As a matter of fact I am not doing anything out of the ordinary, or at least anything that shouldn't be out of the ordinary.  In reality I am only going to start to do more adamantly what we all should be doing anyway. There are a number of reasons for my starting a blog.

First of all, I feel that I am led to share this with you.  I do not know where this is going to go or what is going to happen.  I pray that I do keep up with this blogging and that I am able to become a better person in the end because of it.  I hope that my blogging is found as enlightening and encouraging.  I also hope that you are able to learn something and perhaps better yourself from my work and discovery.

Secondly I want to be able to show everyone that there is a much deeper and serious side of me that many people don't know about, and perhaps even the people that are away of my deeper side are still not aware of how deep it runs and what it is. I fully enjoy being ridiculous and crazy, especially when I am able to use these  attitudes to brighten someone else's day or give them a little laugh. I LOVE making people laugh even if it is laughing at how ridiculous I am.  However, occasionally, my occasional cynicism, ridiculousness, negativity, complaints, "close-mindedness" (I am not close minded, at least I don't think so, but even if I agree with you I like to try and go on the other side to either make a point or to reaffirm our mutual beliefs. I am often open to other beliefs and values as long as they do no conflict with my core, hopefully biblically based beliefs),  absurdness and sometimes even borderline heresies cause people to see me in a particular light.  I do not want the aforementioned attitudes to push people away from me and cause them to think "Yea, Zach is a pretty funny guy, but he is never serious and he needs to grow up," or "Yea I love eating with Zach he makes me laugh so much every meal, but I don't think I could ever have a serious conversation with him or get some serious Godly-like help from him."  Through this blog I want to be able to show everyone that there is much more to me than what you see every meal at Baldwin, or what you see every night in the townhouse.  I may be a crazy guy who is out to have fun and brighten your day, but I also want to be able to brighten your soul and inner person beyond making you feel temporary joy.  This second goal is perhaps one of the most important ones.  I plan to make this blog open and honest.  However, do not let goal #2 scare you into not reading my blog, I still plan to try and be witty and humorous when appropriate, but this is not the underlying intention of this blog and a sense of serious will likely be seen more.  I hope that you still enjoy it all the same.

Thirdly, I want to be able to use this blog as an accountability tool.  I want to be able to post near daily.  The intention of this is to try and force me into a spiritual routine.  This consists of reading the Bible each day and not only reading it, but studying it and meditating on it. (Yes, I have recently learned that there is quite a difference in these three things)  MY spiritual growth is the real purpose behind this. I want to be able to grow spiritually and closer to God than I ever have been, and I am going to believe that the concept of "perfectly-close" to God is not actually attainable and will require my entire life taking steps closer and closer.  Its like forever cutting the distance between us in half.  It will never actually be zero but it will hopefully become quite close. (1, .5, .25, .125, .0625... ect if you need to see that analogy in numbers)  However, I also know that growing closer to God means fellowship, and I need other people to see that there is a level to me that most people do not see.  A more intimate side so to speak.  I also believe that as part of growing to be a man of God we are to take care of our bodies and be everything that we can be.  So I have also devised a workout plan for myself to hopefully follow each morning.  For those of you who know me well enough, I hate working out.  However, I have developed a plan that requires no machines and works completely on your own body weight.  So we will see how that goes.

Fourthly I have been thinking of doing this for a long time, and to a very mild extent I have before.  It helps that a number of my close friends have recently started a blog.  I had originally just been planning on using facebook to write things, but I think this will work better.  There has been a part of me that wanted to express things and say things to people.  In particular the other people I want to say things to are other Christians, especially my Christian peers.  I desire the thoughts, inputs, and open hearts and minds of all you readers.  I desire to be able to teach you a thing or two and show you things that I have found in my life.  I want to encourage you and offer myself to you.  I want to allow people to see that I can be more than the guy who makes you laugh at meals.  I can be that guy, and I love being that guy, but I really want people to know that there is more that I can offer if you want.  As mentioned before, I don't want to be looked at as completely immature and unreasonable.  Believe it or not, I can be very calm, reasonable, and down to earth; I generally just save these times for more intimate situations.  I do ask that you do not see my starting a blog as conforming to other people.  There is no underlying reason for this, there is no motive beyond seeking God and allowing others to see and seek God with me and through me.  It is merely coincidence that caused inspiration that a few of my friends have started a blog.

Fifthly, and this is more obviously considering the length of this entry, I honestly love to write.  Again, do not think this has anything to do with someone that is very dear to me because it is not.  I enjoy writing things that  I  want to write about.  Assignments and things like that are another story.  I love writing about things that are on my mind and heart.  Things that inspire me, things that anger or upset me, things that make me laugh, I love writing because I love being able to provide a way for other people to experience things with me.  It is not so much that I am seeking attention or an audience, more that I am seeking to enlighten and show people things that I find interesting.  And even more unbelievable than my loving of writing, I am beginning to enjoy reading more and more.  This one, I will blame on Lauren Leuschner, but I still don't think that is fair.  I have always enjoyed reading a good book.  I just don't have time or make time to do it, but when I do, and its a book I enjoy, I have never regretted the time.  In particular, I love those like Christian self-help books.  Inspirational books?  Christian nonfiction?  Whatever you call them, I love them.  It secretly excites me when someone recommends one to me that sounds interesting or that they found interesting.  These books also make for great ideas to put into blogs.  Right now the book that I am in is called Connect the Dots, by Mike Hurt.  I am reading it for the young adult group in my church.  It is a short book but I already learned a few things that should have been so obvious but I always missed.  But, I'll save those details for a later post.

Sixthly, and finally, I have found a reason.  The reason, of course, can be found in the url (website) of my blog, Desperate to Glow.  Some time back I heard of the concept of glowing from somewhere.  I do not even  remember where, but it struck a chord.  You know, that chord in your heart that makes your eyes open a little wider, that makes your head lift up a little bit higher to hear more clearly?  The words that snap you back into focus during a chapel that just seem to speak to you for some reason?  For me it was the concept of glowing.  I knew immediately that I wanted to glow.  Before I say more, let me show you where it comes from in the Bible.

The Radiant Face of Moses

 ²⁹ When Moses came down from Mount Sinai with the two tablets of the Testimony in his hands, he was not aware that his face was radiant because he had spoken with the LORD. ³⁰ When Aaron and all the Israelites saw Moses, his face was radiant, and they were afraid to come near him. ³¹But Moses called to them; so Aaron and all the leaders of the community came back to him, and he spoke to them. ³² Afterward all the Israelites came near him, and he gave them all the commands the LORD had given him on Mount Sinai.

 ³³ When Moses finished speaking to them, he put a veil over his face. ³⁴ But whenever he entered the LORD's presence to speak with him, he removed the veil until he came out. And when he came out and told the Israelites what he had been commanded, ³⁵ they saw that his face was radiant. Then Moses would put the veil back over his face until he went in to speak with the LORD.                    ~Exodus 34:29-40 NIV

Here we see that Moses was so close to God, that he was literally glowing.  His face shown so brightly that the people could not stand it and he had to cover himself.  I do not want to cover or hide myself, but I do want what Moses had.  I want to be able to be so close to God that when people look at me they see me glowing.  They see me as radiant in a way they can't explain.  I want to be in such communication, fellowship, and proximity with God that I glow.  This is how to become a man of God, (or woman) this is want I desire and long for.  This is what has caused me to be. . . desperate to glow.

P.S.  Thank you for reading.  I am that I have interested you in my life and with what I am to discover.  I plan on making this summer full of spiritual growth despite the hardships of being consumed with the summer life away from the IWU bubble.  I will try to post as regularly, interestingly, inspirationally, and excitingly as possible.  But please remember, that despite enjoying writing, I am a Computer Science major, so if there are grammar and spelling mistakes forgive me.  Many times I may be writing with a heart full of excitement trying to get my thoughts out and there will be too much to really take the time to fully edit.  If I ever turn my blog into a book I promise to edit it more.  But for now, enjoy and let me know what you think of this first post!

P.S.S GAH! My favorite internet browser, Opera, just did something horrible. It doesn't work right with blogger, (at least my version doesn't) and I ended up accidentally losing the original first post. So this is actually partially redone... o_O  

Your brother, friend, and companion in Christ,

Zachary Haas