A Ridiculous Realization

So there I was today working my third day of work since we've been open full time.  I am a river guide, meaning that I am supposed to spend my time on the river... guiding people -- go figure.  But instead, today I was more of a surfer, but not your traditional water surfer.  Instead, I spent three hours on top of a bus cutting down tree limbs.

We put the tubes for the customers on top of the bus and its really rather convenient until they get hit by a few thousand trees daily.  Thus, my job was to work with two other guys clearing a path for a bunch of inflated pvc.  I somehow was placed on top of the bus with a pair of clippers, while one guy drove me around, and the third grabbed what I cut and drug it into the woods.  This was ridiculously fun for about 10 minutes, then was just work for another 2.5 hours.  However, somewhere in the last 20 minutes I realized that I was completely exhausted.  My hands were cut raw from using clippers, my body was cut up from a bunch of tree limbs and bitten by God only knows what bugs and arachnids he created there.  Not too mention that I frequently bashed my knees while trying to avoid falling of the bus.  So yea, that was my day today.  In all reality is wasn't that bad, I just wanted to make it sound cool.  Anyway, none of this had anything to do with my realization.

I started this blog with the realization that I wanted more in my life.  I wanted to grow closer to God.  As a matter of fact, I wanted to grow so close to God that I was in fact a glowing radiant person.  I understand that the Bible has only mentioned two people that were ever glowing, and one of them was Jesus.  However, I have heard this expression used to describe people.  Anyway, while I was on the roof of a bus destroying nature for 3 hours, I had a lot of time to think.  I didn't really spend much time on this thought but it was interesting.  The name of my blog is Desperate to Glow.  It's relatively self explanatory.  I had a plan when I started that I wanted to follow but still have yet to enact.  I know that I really do want to be able to glow.  I really am desperate for you.  I think the ridiculous realization came because I had this song stuck in my head.

I want to know you
I want to hear your voice
I want to know you more
I want to touch you
I want to see your face
I want to know you more

This is a great worship song.  But if you really think about the lyrics, they are SERIOUSLY lacking something very important.  Yes, they are saying that you want a lot of things from the Lord, but so what?  You can also want a brand new Subaru WRX STI, or a new boat, but wanting them isn't going to do anything for you.  I can desperately want to glow, but thats not going to make me anything but wanting.  Have you figured out what I am getting at yet?  If you want a new car or boat you are going to have to do something about it.  These luxuries are expensive and will take a considerable amount of time working and saving in order to have them.  Is not glowing in Christ a luxury?  Will it not take as much work to accomplish?  I realized that I am desperate to glow, or grow as close to Christ as possible in a way that I never stop growing closer, but what am I doing about it?  I do not doubt that through writing my blog and my bi-weeekly church events I am growing; I am certainly growing a learning a multitude of good things through these events.  However, I think that in order to glow I should be doing something more daily, or perhaps even more than just daily.  Think about anything that glows.  Maybe one of those stars that you used to have on your ceiling when you were a kid.  They need constant light in order to glow when the lights go out.  Even giving them light once a day would only make them glow for a short while.

In an earlier blog post I mentioned that I learned that God's plan for life are written plain as day in the Bible.  I was incredibly inspire by this realization.  I wanted to read through 1 Thessalonians.  Friends, I have yet to look at Thessalonians.  Just now I realize that I haven't neglected the Bible completely.  I think that I mentioned before that there is a difference between studying, meditating, and reading.  I still want to make a more in depth blog on that topic in the future.  The point is, I have always been really good at studying God's word, and especially right now.  I think I am even doing ok meditating, but when it comes to reading I am epically failing.  This is something I still need to work on.

All in all, I realized there is much more to glowing (or growing) that just being desperate for it.  There is much more to God than wanting him.  God is very happy when we are wanting him and desperate for him, however, he is not satisfied.  We need to turn this desire into action.  I need to find a way to actively grow beyond the desire.  I need to be active to glow, I need to be moving to glow, and I need to be sprinting on eagles wings to glow!

My challenge to you this time is to think about this in yourself.  Do you know for a fact that in your core person you are desperate for God?  When you are singing worship songs you feel the spirit moving in you and you want it.  You KNOW that you WANT God... you are DESPERATE for HIM.  However, I want you to think, is this where it ends for you?  Are you stuck at wanting and desiring without attempt and action?  How can we expect to become more like Christ when all we are is wanting to be like Christ?  Jesus never just wanted to be more like his father, he never stopped working to become like his father.  A day never went by that Jesus wasn't living to become more like the Father.  Jesus is the perfect example of turning want and desire to action.  Are you doing the same? Or have you been measured, weighed, and found wanting?

Your friend, brother, and companion in Christ,
-Zachary Haas